


Giardino dell'Eden

by WilliahMagala



Category: Eurovision Song Contest RPF
Genre: Alternate Universe - Flower Shop, Fluff, Language of Flowers, M/M
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-06-17
Updated: 2018-08-28
Packaged: 2019-05-24 15:17:31
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 13
Words: 19,481
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14957075
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/WilliahMagala/pseuds/WilliahMagala
Summary: While Ermal is looking for a present for his mother he finds a small flower shop runed by a very handsome man.





	1. Chapter 1

_Shit, shit, shit._

 

This wasn't good, how could Ermal forget about Mother's day ? He had to buy his mother something, quick or else she would kill him. He was late for Mother's day lunch so if he didn't have a present his mom would be pissed off. He continued to run in the streets of Milan tying to think of a present good enough. He should have wrote her a song, he was a singer after all but the problem was that he didn't have any inspration for the moment. Well “the moment”...It had been 4 months since the last time Ermal managed to write a full song. But that was not what matters right now. A present for his mother, he needed a presnet for his mother.

 

When he tried to take a shortcut he arrived in a quite small street. It felt peaceful, he wondered how he never noticed it before. It even had a small cafe. He passed by a small flower shop and he tought that flowers were always efficient, his mother would like them, right ? Butwhen he entered the shop it was empty. And yet it was even more relaxing and peaceful than the street outside, Ermal should come here more often. But if the owner or at least a clerk wasn't going to show up he was just losing his time. Just when he was about to leave a man came in. He was shorter than Ermal and seemed older. He was also very **very** handsome. His arms were covered by tatoos and his hair were defying gravity. He was stuning and Ermal even forgot why he was here, why he was runing two minutes ago. The man smiled to greet him. Was he a client too ?

 

-Hello welcome to my flower shop, how can I help you ? Are you looking for a bouquet for your mother ?

 

_Wha...how ?_

 

Okay apparently the hot guy was the owner. Well that was a surprise. But a very pleasant one. And this voice, deep and raspy just like Ermal liked them. Sadly he didn't have time for this, he needed a bouquet.

 

-Um, yes. How did you know ?

 

-Hahaha, it's Mother's day. You're not the first, and certainly not the last, one to come here looking for a late present. Are you in hurry ?

 

-Yes, I'm already late.

 

-Okay, I will be fast then. What's your mother's favourite color ?

 

-Purple.

 

-Alright, a bouquet of purple hortensias it is.

 

The man grabbed a few flowers and made a quick and pretty bouquet. And it wasn't expensive. Ermal was impressed, and relieved. He left the flower shop with his bouquet after thanking the man once more. And looking at him a bit longer. God he was really handsome. He checked what time it was on his phone and gasped loudly. He was 15 minutes late already. He heard a faint laugh behind him but he wasn't sure if it was true, he didn't had the time to ask himself if it was either because he began to run again.

 

In the end his mother loved the bouquet and wasn't mad at him.

 

During the whole lunch he couldn't help but think of this small peaceful street and its little flower shop. And of course the flower shop owner. Ermal would definitely go back there.

 

 


	2. Chapter 2

Three weeks later Ermal went to the flower shop again. He waited that long for two reasons : he didn't want it to be too obvious that he wanted to see the hot shop owner again, even if he desperately wanted to. Ermal couldn't figure out if it was only his memories which were biased but he remembered the man as a very tattooed one with a lovely smile. The second reason was that he had no idea where the shop was. He didn't looked at the shop's name and couldn't remember the street's name. He was such in a hurry that it didn't occur him to maybe try to find the name of the peaceful street.

So when he tried to go back to the shop he spent a whole day looking for the street. And when he did find it it was too late, the shop was closed. The next morning he went at the shop, determined to see the man once again.

  
As soon as he was in the street he felt this relaxing feeling once again, it was like magic. The noise of the main street could still be heard but faintly, there were flowers at the windows, the birds were singing, the weather was beautiful, the café was serving a few clients and most importantly the flower shop was open. “Giardino dell'Eden” that was its name. He took a deep breath, felt ridiculous because of this and entered. The man was here, as beautiful as Ermal remembered him, and greeted him with a smile.

“Good morning, welcome to my shop. How can I help you ?”

This voice, this deep voice. Shit, Ermal was beginning to have a crush on him. Well not a “crush” but the man was definitely nice to look at, and to listen to.

“Hello, I would like a bouquet for my mother. She loved the one you made for Mother's day.”

Maybe he said too much, maybe the other man was going to find it creepy, to think that he was weird. But he just nodded.

“Oh yes I remember. Purple hortensias right ? I'm glad she liked it, you seemed in hurry that day so I did it as fast as I could.”

Ermal was shocked, he remembered ? How ?

“Hahaha, don't be surprised. It's a small shop, it's easy to remember people, especially the one who come here for the first time. Oh but maybe you're in hurry today too and I'm bothering you with my talking.”

_It would never bother me to hear you talking, your voice is so hot._

“No, it's okay. I'm not in a rush right now. So ! I would like a bouquet obviously but the thing is that I don't know anything about flowers. Could you help me please ?”

“Of course ! Is the bouquet for a reason in particular ? A birthday or something ?”

“No I'm just going to see her and I figured out that some flowers would be nice.”

“Great ! Then...why don't you go with white chamomiles ? It's the perfect flower to represent motherly love.”

“Like purple hortensias ?”

“Actually it's blue hortensias which represents motherly love, purple means that you want to understand this person better. Or that you're wealthy. But you said purple was her favorite color and it's a beautiful flower so it works too I guess.”

  
Ermal was impressed. He always knew that there was a flower language but he never bothered to try to find out. He was now a bit interested in that language. Or was it just because of how cute the florist looked when he talked about flowers ?

He paid for his flowers and left, a bit reluctantly. The shop was so nice, he never felt that relaxed in weeks, or even in months. He couldn't explain this feeling but he loved it.

Well now that he bought the bouquet he might as well go to see his mom, not that it disturbed him. She was very happy to see him and even more to have flowers, and he was happy to see his mother and to have seen the florist.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter is a bit short I think but I hope you liked it anyway !


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> It's been a long time and this is awfully short but I will do my best to continue to write this fic !

Ermal couldn't stop thinking about the street he found and even more about the flower shop and its owner. He never felt so good and at peace than when he was there. He desperately wanted to go back there but he couldn't find a good reason to go there. Maybe he should buy his mother flowers. For the third time. Yeah it would seem weird and the florist would think that he came only for him. Which was true of course but he didn't need to know that.

 

Thankfully a week later it was his sister's birthday, so he could go back to the shop! He happily reached the Giardino dell'Eden, eager to see the handsome man again. Sadly, he wasn't the only client in the shop when he entered, there was also an old woman chatting with the owner. The owner who looked up and smiled to him when he heard the little bell ring making Ermal's heart melt. The man was so beautiful. Ermal felt home immediately.

 

“Hello, welcome to my shop. I'll be at your service in a minute.”

 

God his voice, Ermal would never get enough of it. It was raspy and deep, and the man spoke in a sweet tone. It was intoxicating.

 

_Get together Ermal, you're not going to have a crush on a stranger._

The man finished the bouquet and gave it to the old woman.

 

“Thank you, Fabrizio, have a good day.”

 

“You too Mrs. Rossi. Sir, it's your turn. What do you need today?”

 

_Fabrizio. His name is Fabrizio. Calm down Ermal, you just know his name it's nothing._

“Hi, I would like a bouquet for my sister's birthday please.”

 

“Hum...what about pink begonias, lilies of the valley and a four-leaf clover? Pink begonias represent friendship and are good for birthdays, lilies of the valley mean that you wish the other to succeed and be happy and the four-leaf clover is for luck. What do you think?”

 

Ermal was impressed, the man took less a minute to think of the bouquet. “Fabrizio” knew what he was doing. Ermal nodded in agreement. It sounded perfect. He didn't know what most of those flowers were. He sucked so bad at gardening.

The bouquet was beautiful. The florist was very good! Sabina was going to love it.

 

“If it's for a birthday do I add a card?”

 

“Yes please.”

 

Ermal wanted to continue to talk with him, his voice was so nice, but he didn't know what to say.

 

“So... your name is Fabrizio?”

 

He didn't do well under pressure okay? The man seemed surprised but smiled. God his smile.

 

“You heard Mrs. Rossi saying it right? Yes, my name is Fabrizio, nice to meet you.”

 

“I'm Ermal, Ermal Meta.”

 

Fabrizio's eyes went wide. Ah yeah, right he was quite famous.

 

“I knew I already saw your face! Oh sorry. I like your songs.”

 

“And I like your flowers.”

 

What. The. Fuck? Why did he say that? But Fabrizio laughed.

 

“Hahaha, thank you! I’m very proud of my flowers.”

 

Ermal didn’t know how to answer to that so he thanked him one more time and paid for the flowers. He turned to wave at Fabrizio when the florist said that he hoped to see him again soon. He. Waved. Why? It was ridiculous. But Fabrizio smiled and waved back. Shit. He was cute and Ermal was doomed.


	4. Chapter 4

Ermal wanted to go back to the flower shop. He needed to. He needed to see Fabrizio again, it was even embarrassing. He wanted to feel that peace he felt every time he went there. The place was also great because it gave him inspiration. He began to write a new song and Ermal could see himself finishing it this time. It seemed like nothing but the pile of unfinished songs growing on his desk showed how uninspired he was.

 

Sadly, he couldn’t go back to the flower shop, not for the moment. He didn’t want to look too eager, even if he was. And he couldn’t go without a reason. But he didn’t have any birthday to attend to or wanted to buy flowers for his mother a third time. He was sure that his mother wouldn’t mind but Fabrizio might think that Ermal was buying flowers only to see him. Which wasn’t true. Ermal wanted to buy flowers to please his mother and sister, to go back to the peaceful shop, to see the handsome face of Fabrizio and hear his sweet and deep voice. Damn it Ermal really had a crush in the florist. But it wasn’t his fault, everyone would have at least a small crush on Fabrizio the hot florist. Who didn’t look like a florist at all with his tattoos and fashion style. Horrible fashion style by the way.

 

Eventually Ermal found a reason to go to the flower shop. His apartment lacked colours and plants, he should buy some flowers or plants to decorate. And why not go to the small flower shop located at the other side of Milan to do so? Because it’s far more convenient. Ermal was pathetic. But right now, he couldn’t bring to care.

 

Ermal went to the shop the next day and, like the times before, stopped as soon as he entered the street still in mesmerised by the atmosphere. The street worked its peaceful magic as always. Ermal couldn’t understand how it was possible that the noises of the main street disappeared but they did. He entered the shop and was welcomed by not one but two bright smiles. What?

 

“Hello welcome to my shop, how can I help you today?”

  
“Hello sir, welcome please buy flowers!”

 

A, very cute Ermal may add, little girl was standing next to Fabrizio. She was his daughter. Ermal didn’t need to ask to know that, it was obvious. They had the same hair, the same eyes, the same skin ton and the same smile. The thought broke Ermal’s heart a bit. Of course, Fabrizio was straight and probably married and had a kid. How could he not? Ermal hid his pain and smiled to them.

 

“Good morning, I’m looking for flowers or plants to decorate my apartment please.”  


“Okay, do you need some advices to choose the plants?”

 

“Yes, that would eb nice, I know nothing in flowers and all that.”

 

He wasn’t lying, he was terrible at this. His mother tried to teach him some things many times but Ermal couldn’t concentrate on what she was saying. Fabrizio asked him how much time he was ready to give to the plans.

 

“Is it a trap question?”  


Fabrizio laughed and Ermal melted. God this laugh. It was the most beautiful melody Ermal has ever heard.

 

“No, it’s not. It’s just that if you’re not very good with plants or don’t have much time to give them it would be better to avoid plants like dahlias or lilies.”  


“Oh well I’m kind of a disaster with plants so…one that need little attention would be nice.”

 

Again, Fabrizio laughed and Ermal realised with embarrassment that he was getting addicted to his laugh. The florist took him to the part of the shop dedicated to cactus and resistant plants. Ermal saw some small cactus which were seriously adorable. But he went for another one, a Rebutia. It would give flowers later, orange ones according to Fabrizio. They went back to the counter so Ermal could pay and he saw the little girl rushing next to the ribbons, obviously very excited to…do something. Ermal didn’t know what she was supposed to do, she seemed very young. Her father laughed and told her that Ermal didn’t need ribbons for his cactus. Oh, so apparently, she oversaw choosing and putting ribbons around the bouquets. The little girl, Anita as Fabrizio called her, seemed very disappointed, letting out a small “oh”. Ermal looked at her and then turned to Fabrizio.

 

“What do you mean I don’t need a ribbon? Then what would I put around the pot?”

 

Immediately Anita went back next to the ribbons with a huge smile on her face. The smiled disappeared quickly as she put on her most serious face to choose the colour of the ribbon. It would be yellow.

 

“Great choice, it’s my favourite colour!”

 

It made the little girl giggle and her father smile softly. He had such a tender look on his face when he looked at his daughter. Fabrizio helped her putting the ribbon around the pot and making a pretty bow.

 

“And here you go sir!”

 

Anita was obviously very proud of her bow. She was way too adorable. Ermal thanked them and left, his pain nearly forgotten. It’s not like he had any chances with the florist anyway. But still, it hurt. He waved back at Anita and left the shop with his cactus.

 

He thought of Fabrizio and his daughter later that week. They were truly adorable together and Fabrizio’s love for Anita was more than obvious, the way he looked at her and spoke to her in the sweetest way said it all. Ermal wished he had this kind of relationship with his father. He chased his thoughts and went back to work. He looked at his new cactus and smiled. He knew how to end his song. Finally.


	5. Chapter 5

Ermal was helplessly staring at his cactus. What should he do? He couldn’t go back to the shop now, never. He couldn’t face Fabrizio ever again.

 

He killed the cactus. He didn’t know how it happened but after one week the cactus was dead, it had a brown colour instead of a green one. Ermal did everything like Fabrizio said, he didn’t water it too much and placed it in a very sunny place. And yet his mother told him that he killed the cactus. He always knew that he wasn’t the most gifted guy when it came to gardening, but this was a whole new level.

 

He waited a few more days, debating on whether he should go back to the flower shop. To say what? That he wasn’t even able of taking care of a simple cactus? That he shouldn’t be trusted with the responsibility of a living element? But at the same time, he wanted to go back to the shop. As usual he only dreamt of being in this peaceful environment again. He presented his last song to his band and producers and they all loved it. They asked what inspired him and for a reason unknown to Ermal he didn’t tell them about the shop. He nearly wanted to make it his secret. Also, he knew that if he told his band about it they would go to the shop and tease him about Fabrizio. Oh god Fabrizio. Ermal knew he shouldn’t but he couldn’t stop thinking about the florist. He was a father, probably married by the way. Ermal was sure that his wife was beautiful with a big smile. He should stop thinking about it, it only hurt him. He didn’t even understand why, he didn’t know the florist after all. All he knew about him was that he had a daughter, he was nice and the most handsome man in all Italy. It wasn’t nearly enough to develop a crush on someone. And yet there was this thing about Fabrizio, in his smile, that made Ermal melt.

 

In the end he decided to go back to the shop. Not to buy flowers this time but just to sit in the shop, surrounded by flowers to try to write songs if Fabrizio was okay with it. Ermal had an album to write and the shop seemed to give him some inspiration so why not use it? With that in mind he went to the shop. He didn’t know how to announce Fabrizio that he killed a cactus in a week yet, he would figure it out later. He arrived at the shop and took a deep breath. He was welcomed by Fabrizio’s big smile. Dear god he was gorgeous.

 

“Hello Ermal! Are you here to buy a companion for your cactus?”

 

Oh dear, the moment arrived way faster than Ermal planned. He stumbled a bit on his words and didn’t meet Fabrizio in the eyes when he explained what happened.

 

“Well actually…there has been a little problem with the cactus.”

 

“A problem? What kind of problem?”

 

“Uhm…it died?”

 

Ermal watched Fabrizio’s eyes going wide.

 

“It died? But…it has only been a week…Oh okay, well that’s not a problem! Do you want to buy something? Another cactus maybe?”

 

Oh no, no, one disaster at once please. Ermal couldn’t bear the thought of killing another plant already. He shook his head and showed his guitar to Fabrizio.

 

“No, I would like to just sit here and try to write some songs if you don’t mind.”

 

Fabrizio’s eyes widen even more if possible.

 

“Of course! I really like your songs and I’m happy that you think my shop is a good place. Stay as long as you want!”

 

Obviously, the florist was very excited, it was adorable. Ermal sat near the lilies and took out his guitar and notebook. He looked around and took a deep breath. He closed his eyes and concentrated on the atmosphere, on how he felt at this moment. This feeling of peace was incredible and never failed to amaze him. He listened to all the sounds. Fabrizio was cutting flowers, humming lightly but Ermal couldn’t recognize the song. It was hot, so the door was open and Ermal could hear the birds singing and the busy noises of the café in the street. There were also people talking outside. Suddenly words arrived, tons of them. Sentences were making sense sometimes, sometimes not. Ermal tried to write as fast as he could. It was amazing, he didn’t have that many ideas for a song in months! After only 3 hours the song was mostly written, it only missed a verse.

 

“Fabrizio? Does it bother if I take out my guitar?”

 

  
“No of course, go on.”

 

The shop was mostly calm, there were only a few clients coming. They were surprised to hear music, but they didn’t seem to mind. Ermal kept playing for two hours until Fabrizio told him that he was going to close the shop.

 

“Holy shit what time is it?”

 

“Nearly 6pm. I didn’t want to bother you, but I have to go home.”

 

“Oh yes of course. Thank you so much for letting me here. I haven’t finished the song yet; do you mind if I come back tomorrow?”

 

“Not at all, it was a pleasure to have you.”

 

Ermal knew that he only said that to be polite, but it made him happy. Feeling bad to leave without buying anything he picked up a few lilies and paid for them. Fabrizio looked at him weirdly.

 

“You sure? I mean you don’t have to and I like those flowers, I don’t want them do die during the night.”

 

That little shit. Fabrizio had a smug smile, proud of himself. Clearly that man was lucky he was so hot. No, no, he is a father and probably married, we don’t think like that of married fathers. Bad Ermal.

 

Ermal told him that he wanted to buy them and paid for his flowers. He left the shop thanking Fabrizio again for letting him stay. He couldn’t wait for tomorrow.


	6. Chapter 6

The next day Ermal was back at the shop, as promised, with his guitar and notebook to finish writing the song. He was so excited to finish his song. And to see Fabrizio again. He had a plan, if he couldn’t date him he was going to be friends with him. Well at least he hoped they could be friends, Ermal felt so good and relaxed next to the florist.

 

When he arrived at the shop he was greet by Fabrizio’s smile. He was so beautiful. Wait what was that? He was going to be **friends** with him. Nothing more. He was a father, probably straight and married. Ermal couldn’t pin for someone like that. Ermal smiled back to him.

 

“Hi Fabrizio, is it still okay for me to sit and play guitar?”

 

“Of course, make yourself comfortable and let me know if you need anything.”

 

“I will, thanks.”

 

Ermal sat next to the orchids and took out his guitar. He tuned it and then went back to work. He had a verse to finish and the melody wasn’t good yet. He took a deep breath and looked around. Fabrizio was making a bouquet behind the counter, he was very concentrated on his task. The sounds of the street, birds and café could be heard just like yesterday. A few words came into Ermal’s mind. Yeah that sounded good. He wrote them down, humming lightly. He couldn’t see it, but Fabrizio looked at him when he began to hum and smiled softly at the sight of the singer working.

 

Some clients came in while Ermal was playing guitar and seemed very surprised to see someone paying music in the small flower shop, even more for the ones who recognized Ermal, but luckily nobody came to disturb him. A few times he had to stop and move because he blocked Fabrizio’s way to the orchids but overall it was calm. A few hours later the song was now finished and ready to be recorded. Just in time for lunch, perfect. Ermal sent a message to his band and his producer to tell them about his new song and went to Fabrizio. The florist smiled to him when he approached the counter.

 

“Hey how is the song going?”  

 

“It’s finished, you want to hear it?”

 

“Hahahaha I already did. It’s a very nice song, I would love to listen to it once more.”

 

It made Ermal stupidly happy, to know that Fabrizio liked his song. He sang it one more time to Fabrizio who applauded once he was finished.

 

“Bravo, it’s a really good song!”

 

“Thanks. Hum tell me…when is your lunch break?”

 

“Now, why?”

 

“I would like to invite you to a restaurant, to thank you for letting me stay here and write a song.”

 

“Oh, it was my pleasure, you don’t have to.”

 

“I insist.”

 

After a few minutes Fabrizio accepted to go to the restaurant. He knew a small one not too far away, so they went there. They talked a bit on their way there, about Ermal’s new song mostly. Once they were at the restaurant and were sitting at a table they began to talk about other things like Fabrizio’s shop, what they liked to do outside their jobs, music again. They both really liked music and they had similar tastes. The conversation was easy between them, it made Ermal happy.

 

“Oh, and the little girl who was with you at the shop when I bought the cactus, she’s your daughter?”

 

“Yes! Her name is Anita, she is adorable. She is 5 and likes to come to the shop to help me from time to time when I have her.”  


Fabrizio was adorable when he talked about his daughter or his son, he also had a son Libero who was 9. His face lighted up with a huge smile. Then it hit him. Wait what? When he had her? What did it mean? Oh no, Ermal was getting his hopes up.

 

“When you have her?”

 

“Ah yes, their mother and I are separated, have been for a few years now.”

 

“Oh, I’m sorry.”

 

“No, it’s okay, we’re still friends and I moved on now. Anyway, can you explain me how you managed to kill a cactus in a week? I’m really curious.”

 

Ermal talked to Fabrizio but he was thinking of something completely different. Fabrizio was separated from his children’s mother. He moved on now. But that didn’t mean he was single or attracted to men. Ermal was lost and confused, he needed answers. He needed to know if the florist was single and attracted to men. Because the more they talked the more Ermal liked Fabrizio. He wasn’t only calm, and it was relaxing to be around him. If only it was just that. He was smart, funny, nice and very interesting. His views on many famous singers were fair but never mean, it was obvious that he respected them.

 

It seemed like lunch ended way too quickly according to Ermal, even if they spent more than one hour talking and eating. Now Fabrizio was late to go back to the shop and apologized to Ermal before running off. Ermal paid for their meal, which wasn’t a problem because he already planned to do it anyway. He checked his phone and noticed that his producers were ready to record the song. Well that was fast. Ermal went to the studio to record it his head still full of thoughts about Fabrizio. Once the recording was over, the band and producers were very happy with the song, Ermal remembered that he didn’t buy flowers from the shop and felt bad about it. Well, he was going to go back there in a few days to make up his mistake.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for reading !


	7. Chapter 7

Ermal went back to the shop the next week. He was getting addicted to the shop, and the florist, it was weird and embarrassing how much he loved that place, and the florist. But this time he had a reason, he had to buy flowers for a friend who just gave birth. And as always, he preferred to go to the shop located at the opposite side of the town rather than one closer.

 

When he entered the shop, he was welcomed by Fabrizio’s smile. Oh god Ermal needed help.

 

“Hello Ermal, how are you doing?”

 

“I’m fine, I’m looking for a bouquet for a friend who just gave birth. Is there any flower that wold work in the flower language?”

 

“Oh, you’re interested in the flower language?”

 

No, he wasn’t, he just liked the way Fabrizio was passioned about it. His eyes would shine, and his smile would be so big when he talked about flowers and explain their signification to Ermal. This man was so adorable it was probably illegal in some countries.

 

“I’m trying to understand it better yeah.”

 

Lie. But Fabrizio didn’t need to know that. He was already thinking about flowers.

 

“Let’s see… white lilac? Or white lies. White roses? White flowers in general, they symbolise purity and are beautiful. Oh, and it’s march so daffodils are their flower of birth.”

 

“Flower of birth?”

 

“Yes, each month is linked to a flower.”

 

“Oh, wow. What is mine? I’m born in April.”

 

“Oh, me too! It’s daisies.”

 

Ermal was a bit disappointed, he expected something more…exciting. Daisies were a bit childish. But he learnt that they were born during the same month and for some reason it made him happy.

 

“Daisies are childish no?”

 

“Yes, but they also represent purity and innocence. And it’s always a nice flower.”

 

“Is there any flower that isn’t nice for you?”

 

Fabrizio laughed and admitted that no, there wasn’t a flower that isn’t nice. They all had their qualities and were beautiful in their own way.

 

“Like people actually.”

 

Wow well this was deep now. Ermal didn’t know what to say. He settled down with daffodils, he liked this flower and it would bring colour in the room of his friend. He talked a bit with Fabrizio about his song, thanking him again for letting him write here. Fabrizio told him that it was his pleasure, it was nice to see him write and compose songs. He loved it. He said that “it made a pretty sight, you and your guitar in the middle of flowers.” And honestly Ermal didn’t know what to do with this information. He was a pretty sight? No “in the middle of flowers” Fabrizio said, the man loved flowers, so he would obviously like the sight of someone in the middle of flowers, right? It didn’t mean anything, Ermal shouldn’t get his hopes up.

 

“Oh, by the way, I’m going to your concert tomorrow.”

 

Ermal looked at him with wide eyes.

 

“You do?”

 

“Of course, I told you I like your songs.”

 

“Well I hope you will like the concert.”

 

“I’m sure I will, I’ll go with my children, they also like your songs.”

 

Ermal thanked him one more time and left the shop. He wasn’t okay. Fabrizio was going to his concert. He had to be good, so he could impress him. Oh no what was he going to wear? He also had to look good. Fabrizio said he liked his songs but what was his favourite? He should have asked. Should he invite him backstage? What if the concert ended too late and Fabrizio wants to go home because of his children? What if he doesn’t even want to see him? Ermal was panicking like he never did for a concert before.

 

The next day he couldn’t stay still, he was too nervous. It annoyed Marco and amused Andrea.

 

“For god’s sake Ermal stop moving like that, you’re exhausting me.”

 

“Why are you so stressed? Is it because of someone?”

 

Oh no. Should he tell them? They would tease him a lot. Sadly, his body betrayed him, and he blushed while looking down.

 

“Oh, there _is_ someone! Who is it? A girl? A boy? Something else? Tell us everything.”

 

“Stop being so fond of gossip Andrea. It’s a man, a florist I met.”

 

“Oh, is it the guy from the flower shop you talked about? Nice. How is he? Is he gay or attracted to men?”

 

Andrea was exhausting and Ermal already regretted talking about it.

 

“His name is Fabrizio, he is very nice and handsome. I don’t know if he’s attracted to men, he has 2 children.”

 

“You have to invite him backstage.”

 

Marco finally stopped being silent.

 

“Marco not you too.”

 

They continued to tease him and ask a lot of questions. They were also offended that he never talked about him before but honestly Ermal didn’t want to talk about it. He felt ridiculous having a crush on a guy he barely knew and who was probably not even interested in him. Why would he? He was so…and Ermal was so… Ermal sighed. It was useless.

 

Fabio came in Ermal’s dressing room to help him dressing up. Now Ermal was nervous, Fabio’s choices were often unusual and original. And Ermal really wanted to look hot tonight. He wanted to be wow. But apparently Fabio had something else in mind and stayed true to himself by showing him a golden sparkly jacket. If only it was only the jacket. All the outfits were either sparkly or just weird. A bubble wrap jacket, seriously? Where did he even find that? Ermal knew he was precious but that was too far. Marco was standing behind Fabio and mouthed “fire him”. Marco never liked Fabio’s choices.

 

“Um Fabio it’s very…interesting but I was hoping for something more basic.”

 

“And sexier too, he has someone to seduce.”

 

“Andrea!”

 

Andrea winked at him. Ermal should change his friends. But Andrea wasn’t wrong, Ermal wanted to be sexy. And yes, it was to seduce Fabrizio, even if it was hopeless. Fabio humpfed, obviously offended that someone criticized his choices. Maybe Ermal should fire him after all, this guy couldn’t accept critics. But his stylist did as he was told and chose a nice blue shirt. Ermal looked nice. He also chose a white t-shirt and some jewellery. This wasn’t bad at all, Ermal liked it.

 

The concert was about to being and Ermal was shaking. He couldn’t make any mistakes tonight. Fabrizio was going to be here. He had to be impressive and do his best. And he wanted to please his fans of course. His musicians came on stage and Ermal heard the crowd cheering. It wasn’t a huge crowd, about 200 people. How was he going to spot Fabrizio in the crowd? Suddenly it was his turn to go on stage. He put on his biggest smile, he was nervous and couldn’t wait to sing. He loved being on stage and feel people’s energy. He looked around as the crowd cheered loudly. He couldn’t see Fabrizio. What if he wasn’t here? No, he said he was going to be here with his children. Ermal said hello to his fans and immediately began with “ragazza paradisio”. At the middle of the song he finally saw familiar faces. Not so far away from the stage Fabrizio and his children were standing. Anita was on her dad’s shoulders and next to Fabrizio there was a little boy, Libero if Ermal remembered well. Anita smiled brightly to him and made big movements with her arms to say hello to Ermal. Ermal smiled back and waved at her, making fans scream. He continued to sing while looking at Fabrizio. He was beautiful, even if Ermal couldn’t see his face that well. However, he could see that Fabrizio was smiling and dancing lightly, well more like bouncing to the rhythm of the song. It made Ermal melt. He wasn’t going to survive.

 

The concert went very well, Ermal sang well and looked at Fabrizio a lot. Maybe too much? It wasn’t his fault, how was he supposed to no look when Fabrizio was mouthing the lyrics of his songs? Oh, dear god Ermal wanted to hear him sing so bad, his voice must be beautiful. Deep and warm. No, he couldn’t imagine this, not now, the concert wasn’t over yet. But once it was his band went backstage but not him. He went to meet his fans, took some photos a bit reluctantly but mostly he looked out for Fabrizio and his children. He wanted to see them, to know what they thought of the concert and to invite them backstage. The last part he wasn’t so sure, what if he said no?

 

Eventually he saw them, they stayed behind. Maybe they were waiting for him? Anyway, he went to them. It struck him once more how much Anita looked like her father. The little boy not so much, even if Fabrizio could be seen in his traits. Fabrizio smiled when he saw him getting closer. He let Anita go, he was holding her on his side.

 

“Hi Ermal!”

 

“Hello, Fabrizio, how are you?”

 

“I’m great, the concert was amazing!”

 

Ermal blushed a bit. The cncert was amazing so Ermal was amazing too right? Maybe he was reading a bit too much in it.

 

“You remember Anita? She came to the shop helping me.”

 

“Of course I do, who could forget such a pretty little lady?”

 

The little girl giggled and greeted him.

 

“Hi Ermal, the concert was so cool! I loved it!”

 

“I’m glad!”

 

Then Fabrizio put a hand on the little boy’s back.

 

“And this is my son, Libero. He is 9.”

 

“Hi Libero, nice to meet you.”

 

“Nice to meet you too, the concert was great.”

 

“Thanks.”

 

Libero seemed very polite. Ermal liked that. He proposed them to go backstage with him and prayed every god he could think of that they accepted. They did immediately. They followed Ermal in his dressing room where the band was waiting. Well it was only Marco and Andrea; the others were probably somewhere else drinking beers or something. Ermal presented everyone and tried to ignore the knowing looks of Marco and Andrea.

 

“So, Fabrizio, you’re the florist we heard so much about?”

 

What was Andrea doing? They didn’t hear “so much about” what was he saying? Also, subtlety was Andrea’s strongest point. Fabrizio blushed a bit.

 

“I don’t know, I hope so. I hope he talked about me in a good way.”

 

Wait what? He hoped so? What did it mean? Was it a good sign? Ermal was lost.

 

“Oh, don’t worry about that, he did.”

 

Andrea…Ermal was going to kill him. What was he doing?

 

“Can you please stop talking about me like I wasn’t right here?”

 

Libero got closer to Ermal, a bit shyly.

 

“Excuse me, is it true that you’re Albanian?”

 

Ermal was a bit surprised. Why was he asking that? But he put on a smile and answered as sweetly as he could without sounding fake.

 

“I am, yes, why are you asking?”

 

“Can you say something in Albanian please?”

 

The boy seemed curious and excited. Ermal saw Fabrizio paying a bit less attention to Andrea and a bit more to their conversation. Oh, so he was interested in hearing him speaking Albanian too? Ermal felt proud of it, he loved his Albanian culture and language. Only two people weren’t interested, Marco and Anita were talking in a corner about god knows what.

 

“Of course. Let’s see, what could I say?”

 

“Can you say hello and present yourself please?”

 

“ _Alo, emri im eshte Ermal._ ”

 

Libero looked at him, obviously impressed. It made Ermal proud. He looked at Fabrizio who had a weird expression on his face. What did it mean?

 

The family stayed with them a bit more until Libero and Anita couldn’t stop yawning and Fabrizio declared that they should go to sleep. He thanked the band for having them and congratulate them one more time, took Anita who was half asleep in his arms and left. Once the door was closed Andrea and Marco turned to Ermal.

 

“Wow Erm, he’s hot!”

 

“And nice. He’s cool.”

 

Yeah tell Ermal something he didn’t know.

 

“And he was also interested in you.”

 

“Yeah that was obvious.”

 

Okay that Ermal didn’t know.


	8. Chapter 8

“Wait what?”

 

Ermal was more than shocked. Andrea and Marco just told him that apparently Fabrizio was interested in him and it was obvious. Which wasn’t possible. Was it? How? Ermal was…Ermal and Fabrizio was so Fabrizio. He couldn’t be interested in him. He sat down, he couldn’t stand up. It wasn’t possible, was it? Ermal didn’t know. The chaos in his head might have been seen on his face because Andrea and Marco looked at him worried.

 

“Ermal are you okay?”

 

“Ermal, talk to us.”

 

“He… What?”

 

His friends looked at each other and then at him.

 

“You didn’t notice?”

 

“Wow Ermal I knew you were oblivious but that is another level.”

 

“But how do you know? I mean you talked to him for 20 minutes, it’s not enough to notice anything, right?”

 

Andrea smiled to him.

 

“20 minutes where he couldn’t stop looking at you. Especially when you were speaking Albanian. I think he really liked it if you know what I mean.”

 

Marco looked at him knowingly.

 

“And according to Anita, lovely little girl by the way, her father talked about you and was very excited about the concert. They listened to your songs a lot at home.”

 

Ermal blushing. Fabrizio did that? Anita didn’t have a reason to lie, so it must be true. Oh dear, his interest might be mutual. And Fabrizio liked when he spoke Albanian. It made Ermal blush even more. What was he going to do now? Apparently, he thought out loud because Marco slapped the back of his head.

 

“Confess of course, oh my god Ermal it’s obvious, even you should realize that.”

 

“Ask him on a date, bring him to a nice restaurant. Buy him flowers, he’s a florist so he likes flowers.”

 

“A date?”

 

A date. Yes, a date would be nice. But what if Fabrizio said no? What if he did talk about him and was excited and liked when he spoke Albanian but in a friendly way? Ermal didn’t know if he could handle another heartbreak. Sadly, he knew heartbreak way too well, since he was famous many men and women tried to date him just for fame or money. Fabrizio wasn’t like that, at least Ermal hoped, he was too nice for that. But so has been Sofia, Michele, Rosa and Alessandro. He sighed, he needed to think about it, everything was too much right now.

 

Two days later he took his decision. He was going to ask Fabrizio Mobrici on a date. He planned everything out. He was going to buy him flowers and wait for him to close the shop and then he will ask him on date. If, by some miracle, he said yes, they would go to a small very nice restaurant where they wouldn’t be bothered, and the atmosphere was quite romantic and intimate. It would be perfect. Then he would pay for dinner and walk Fabrizio home. And maybe, just maybe if the gods felt extra nice, he would kiss him. The simple thought made his heart beat faster. He was reacting like some dumb teenager with his first crush, it was ridiculous. Fabrizio had too much effect on him.

 

He went to Bizio’s flower shop to buy flowers for him. It was in the middle of the afternoon, so he wouldn’t have to wait too long for Fabrizio. He realized that he called Fabrizio “Bizio” and blushed. Could he give him nicknames, even if it was only in his head? Well it was only in his mind, so it would be okay right?

 

He entered the shop. Fabrizio looked up and smiled brightly at him. It was good sign, right? Anyway, he was adorable. Ermal went to the counter. He needed help to choose the flowers. Maybe asking the person who was going to receive the flowers wasn’t the best idea but Ermal wanted to be sure that he chose well.

 

“Hello Ermal, how are you?”

 

“I’m fine and you?”

 

“I’m great. What do you need today?”

 

“I would like a beautiful bouquet please.”

 

“Oh, it’s for your mother again? If I remember well, you bought two already.”

 

He remembered! It made Ermal happy to know that. He blushed and looked down. It was very embarrassing now that he thought about it.

 

“No…it’s for someone special. Not my mom.”

 

Fabrizio stopped smiling. He was suddenly very serious and… sad? But Ermal, being the oblivious dumbass he was, didn’t realised that.

 

“Oh, someone has a date tonight?”

 

Fabrizio’s voice sounded a bit too sweet and cheerful, like if it was forced. But Ermal still didn’t notice anything.

 

“Yes, at least I hope I will. Anyway, I wanted to tell them that I like them. What should I use?”

 

It was a risky move. Because later Fabrizio would understand that Ermal liked him. It made him nervous. Fabrizio’s face was closed, he seemed a bit upset.

 

“Red roses. It’s a classic.”

 

His voice sounded a bit dry and harsh. This time Ermal noticed it. Why was he upset? Did he understand that Ermal was going to confess to him and he didn’t like that? Oh no. Maybe he shouldn’t ask him out after all. No. He was going to do it, even if Fabrizio was going to refuse. It will help him get over his crush. Yes, it was a good solution.

 

“Red roses…it seems a bit plain and boring, no? What would _you_ like to receive?”

 

It was a bold move, Ermal knew that. Somehow it seemed to make Fabrizio even more upset. He really didn’t like the idea of Ermal confessing? Ermal should have bought ice cream to deal with his future heartbreak. Well at least he had wine.

 

“Well, red tulips have the same meaning and more beautiful if you ask me. Lilac is very good too, it means “my heart is yours”. Violet is also nice, it represents secret love.”

 

“How would it look if you mixed them all?”

 

“A bit weird. Especially with the red tulip. But if the meaning is more important then go for it.”

 

“Um, meaning is more important. Okay let’s go for this.”

 

Fabrizio made the bouquet, but his movements were more rough than usual. It scared Ermal a bit. In the end the bouquet seemed a bit weird but still quite nice, especially with the meaning. He thanked Fabrizio who just hummed in response. Tonight didn’t look good. But Ermal had the flowers, he couldn’t back out now. And he made a reservation for the restaurant. He left the shop and went to the café on the other side of the street. He sat there and ordered a coffee. He put the bouquet carefully next to him and took out a notebook. He wanted to write something. He thought about Fabrizio, about his smile. He had the most beautiful smile and it always sent chills down Ermal’s spine. He began to write a love song for Fabrizio. Eventually after a few hours Fabrizio closed the shop. Immediately Ermal rushed to his side. Fabrizio seemed surprised to see him.

 

“Ermal, you’re not at your date?”

 

“No, it’s not time yet. Um. How do I do that?”

 

Ermal didn’t really think of how he was going to ask Fabrizio out. What should he say? “Please gout with me?” Well it didn’t really matter, Fabrizio was going to say no. The way he acted in the shop spoke for itself. Ermal hawked awkwardly while Fabrizio was still looking at him, confused. Ermal presented the bouquet to him and Fabrizio was even more confused.

 

“Here it’s for you.”

 

“What? Isn’t it for your date?”

 

“Well…I was kind of…hoping that…you would, um, you would be my date tonight? I mean if you want to of course. It’s okay if you don’t. But um… At least keep the flowers?”

 

Fabrizio’s eyes went wider and wider while Ermal was talking. Ermal was more nervous than before any of his concert, more than when he asked people out in the past. Of course, he already knew Fabri’s answer. But still. And he continued with the nicknames. He should stop that. Fabrizio opened and closed his mouth many times. Why was he acting surprised? He knew that Ermal was going to ask him out already no?

 

“What?”

 

His voice was weak. Wait what was happening? Fabrizio didn’t know that he was going to ask him out? Ermal was as lost as the florist but for different reasons.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Newt chapter will arrive quickly! At least I hope it will


	9. Chapter 9

They stayed like that a few minutes, looking at each other with wide eyes. Ermal was confused, Fabrizio didn’t know that he was going to ask him on date? Then why was he upset earlier? That made no…Oh. _Oh._ Ermal had a small idea. Maybe, just maybe, Fabrizio was jealous. Maybe he liked him back and didn’t want him to go on a date with someone else. He took his chance and asked again.

 

“I was thinking that maybe you would be my date tonight? We would go the restaurant. It’s okay if you don’t want to.”

 

Fabrizio looked at him, his eyes still wide. He took a deep breath.

 

“Yes.”

 

Wait what?

 

“What?”

 

“Yes, I want to go on a date with you.”

 

Ermal couldn’t believe it. He was going on a date! With Fabrizio! Okay he had to nail this date like never. Maybe he would even kiss him! He was so excited. He smiled brightly at Fabrizio.

 

“My outfit isn’t really good for a date though.”

 

Ermal looked at Fabrizio’s outfit. It was black t-shirt, black ripped jeans and black sneakers. He looked good. But to be fair he always did.

 

“Oh, don’t worry, you look good.”

 

Fabrizio blushed a bit and thanked him. Ermal showed him the way to the restaurant. It wasn’t too far away so they could go by walking, it wasn’t a problem. During their walk they talked about their day. Fabrizio told him about a woman who came in and asked for green roses.

 

“I’m pretty sure she was drunk.”

 

“At 9 in the morning?”

 

“I’ve seen worse.”

 

“Do I want to hear the worst?”

 

“No, it will cut your appetite.”

 

“Good thinking.”

 

They ordered food and Ermal, who already went there, gave some advices to Fabrizio. It was nice because he also learnt things about Fabrizio. For example, that he loved spicy food and tomatoes. It was always nice to know it, even if it scared him when Fabrizio ordered a spicy dish and ask if it was possible to add some spices. This man wasn’t human. Ermal looked at the menu and he knew that he had to be careful. It was their first date so no spaghettis because it’s physically impossible to eat it properly, no Gaelic because if by any miracle they kissed he would have a horrible breath and no salad, because it can get stuck in his teeth and it would embarrassing. In the end he ordered a pizza.

 

They talked a lot while waiting for their food and learnt a lot about each other. Like the fact that Fabrizio was from Rome, that’s why he kept talking in dialect and with an accent, but he moved to Milan for his studies a few years ago and he loved the town so much he decided to stay. However, he missed his hometown sometimes because his family still lives there. Ermal talked to him about his last tour and album, how he was so happy every time he met his Lupis.

 

“They can act weirdly sometimes but I love them, they’re always supporting and defending me.”

 

“Yeah I saw that.”

 

“Really?”

 

“I told you, I’m a fan.”

 

Their dishes arrived and Ermal asked Fabrizio if he could eat a bit of his food. He regretted it immediately. It was so spicy, it was impossible to eat. He began to cough loudly and a lot. That’s not how he pictured their first date. Fabrizio asked a waitress if they could have milk for Ermal and asked him if he was okay. Once Ermal felt better, thanks to the milk, he noticed that Fabrizio got closer and kept smoothing his back. It was very nice.

 

“Dear god Fabrizio, how can you eat that?”

 

Fabrizio took a bite without a problem and smiled to Ermal.

 

“I think it’s delicious.”

 

“You’re a monster, are you really human?”

 

“Damnit, I’ve been discovered!”

 

They continued to talk and joked about the food. After a moment Ermal felt bold and approached Fabri’s hand. He tentatively caressed the back of his hand and Fabrizio smiled to him and turned his hand over to hold Ermal’s. They smiled to each other and continued their conversation about the importance of music. For Fabrizio music was to send a message, to express an opinion and something that brought people together. Ermal could only agree with him. Music made for dancing and entrained people wasn’t necessarily bad, but he didn’t think it was the point of music to him. However, he did like some songs that didn’t hold a message. He also discovered that Fabrizio loved rock, Iron Maiden, Metallica, AC/DC and all, which wasn’t a surprise at all. Everyone who saw Fabrizio could guess that, especially with his band shirts. What was surprising however was that he also loved classical music and love songs.

 

“I know it’s a bit ridiculous, but I love them, some are so beautiful. It makes me wish someone would love me as much as people do in the songs. Or at least sing them to me. Is it sappy?”

 

“Not at all.”

 

Ermal thought about the love song he wrote for Fabrizio earlier, while waiting for him to close the shop. It wasn’t finished yet. Maybe one day he would have the guts to sing it to him. Maybe. Sadly, they finished their plates too soon. Both didn’t feel like having a dessert. Ermal didn’t know what to do know, he didn’t want to leave.

 

Suddenly Fabrizio took a deep breath and looked at Ermal. He seemed sad now. Why? Did Ermal do anything? What was it? Fabrizio caressed the back of his hand before letting it go. What?

 

“Ermal, I…. I need to tell you something.”

 

Ermal was terrified. It didn’t sound good at all.

 

“I…this date was a mistake. Not in the sense that it was bad but just because I can’t be your boyfriend.”

 

“What?”

 

Ermal’s voice was so weak the sound nearly didn’t come out. What was happening? The date was going well, no? It was just him who was too blind to realise that everything went wrong? What was it?

 

“It’s just that…You’re a celebrity Ermal. You’re a famous singer. You will be on tour, you will be very busy and away. Maybe we won’t be able to see each other. And your fans, what are they going to say? I mean, two men being together isn’t the most accepted thing in Italy.”

 

Ermal couldn’t breathe. What? Why? Two minutes ago, he was happy because his date was going well, and he wasn’t going to end up with his heart broken but now…It was worse than earlier this afternoon, when he prepared himself to get rejected, because now he didn’t prepare himself. He felt like he was going to cry.

 

“I’m sorry Ermal.”

 

Fabrizio got up and went to pay for his part of the meal. Ermal stayed at the table, still shocked. It couldn’t be real. It couldn’t be happening. No, Fabrizio was nice, and he would never break his heart like that. He would never make him hope and then crush his dreams. No, not Fabrizio. Fabrizio wasn’t like his exes. Fabrizio was… No. No. Ermal watched Fabrizio looking at him one last time, looking sorry, before leaving. At least he took the flowers with him.

 

Like a robot Ermal got up too and went to pay. He was like a robot, he did everything mechanically. He left the restaurant and stood there. Ermal took out his phone and called Andrea, to pick him up and take him home. It was late, and his apartment was far away. When he heard Andrea’s voice asking him why he called and how the date went Ermal began to cry. He wanted to do it for the past 5 minutes. Andrea panicked when he heard him crying so much he couldn’t breathe.

 

“Ermal? Ermal what’s wrong?? What happened?”

 

“He…he…he… Andrea, please come pick me up, I want to go home. Please.”

 

Ermal gave him the address and hung up the phone. He stayed in the street, crying, until Andrea arrived 5 minutes later. His friend got out of the car and rushed to him, he hugged him.

 

“Ermal, what happened? Where is Fabrizio?”

 

“Andrea, he…he doesn’t want to date me. He said that because I’m famous it would be too complicated and…and…he left. What am I going to do now?”

 

Ermal was having troubles to breathe. Andrea didn’t answer him and smoothed his back. He got him home and called Marco who rushed to Ermal’s place. His two friends stayed with him, doing their best to understand what happened and comfort Ermal. Ermal couldn’t understand what he did wrong, what made Fabrizio suddenly think that he didn’t want to date him. Did he ever want to date him in the first place? He said that he couldn’t because Ermal was famous. Why? Why was it always his fame? Why couldn’t he be happy?

 

“I hate being a celerity. Maybe if I stopped music he would date me?”

 

Ermal was desperate. He wanted Fabrizio, no matter what. Andrea and Marco looked at him sadly.

 

“Ermal…be serious. You love music and you love your fans. You’re not going to throw it away just for a guy?”

 

“But it’s not just for him! It’s for Sofia, Alessandro, Rosa and Michele. Every time it was because of my fame. I hate it.”

 

“You’re saying that because you feel too much right now. You should go to sleep. And you can’t compare you exes to Fabrizio, the situation isn’t the same.”

 

Ermal knew that. Like Andrea told him to he went to sleep, but he mostly cried in his pillow thinking of Fabrizio. Fabrizio smiling to him, Fabrizio holding his hand, Fabrizio laughing with him. Fabrizio looking guilty, Fabrizio telling him he couldn’t date him, Fabrizio leaving the restaurant, leaving Ermal alone. Always alone when it came to love.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> To quote Fabrizio "I'm sorry", I really am, please don't hate me.


	10. Chapter 10

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Kudos to Ceci for helping me !

When Ermal woke up, his eyes were red and puffy from crying so much. He cried himself to sleep, and he didn’t even sleep much. But that wasn’t unusual for him. He felt bad, like if he was sick and going to puke. He was sad, frustrated and angry. Angry at Fabrizio for doing this to him, angry at himself for hoping and angry at his career for ruining his relationship. Was there even a relationship to begin with? No, because Fabrizio gave him one of the best dates of his life and then destroyed everything, including Ermal’s heart. And what for? Because Ermal was a famous singer. The more he thought about the angrier he was. That was it? He was famous and would go on tour, so Fabrizio couldn’t date him? Then why did he accept the date in the first place? Fabrizio really couldn’t think of a shittier excuse to reject Ermal. It disgusted him. How could someone pass from pure happiness to crying all night in a matter of minutes?

 

He crawled to the music room. He didn’t feel like eating. He saw himself in the mirror, he looked horrible. And he had an interview this evening. The make up artist will have a lot of work to make him look decent. Once in the room he noticed that Andrea or Marco put his bag in here, the bag he had with him yesterday. His friends weren’t here, they left a note next to the bag.

 

_Hey Ermal, we hope you’re feeling better. We had to leave, there is something we need to see at the studio, nothing important don’t worry, you don’t have to come. Please eat._

_We love you._

 

Ermal smiled at the note. It was very simple, but he knew his friends. They were worried about him and Ermal couldn’t blame them. He opened his bag and took out his notebook. He saw the love song he began to write for Fabrizio. The words were so full of love. If only he knew. He thought about Fabrizio, did he ever stop? During their date he mentioned that he loved love songs. It made Ermal mad, to think about it.

 

“Oh, so you like love songs uh? Well look what at I do with your stupid love song.”

 

While saying this he ripped the page with the lyrics off the notebook and tore it before throwing it in the bin. He took his notebook again and felt suddenly very inspired for a new song, if he could he would sing it tonight, to show everyone how much love is garbage.

 

* * *

 

 

Fabrizio Mobrici was full of regrets. He has been since the very moment he said the words “I need to tell you something”. He saw Ermal’s face tense and the worry in his eyes. He immediately wanted to say something else, like “this is the best date I went to in a long time” or “I think we should take it to the bedroom”, really anything else than “I can’t date you”. But it was for the best. It was the best thing to do. But the look on Ermal’s face, he looked like he was going to cry. It broke Fabri’s heart to say this. It was probably even worse for Ermal. He wanted to hug him and tell him that he changed his mind, he wanted to date him. But it wouldn’t have been reasonable.

 

That was what he kept repeating himself, maybe like that he would accept it. Because like in a shitty romance novel his sister used to read his brain said something and his heart another. He knew that dating a star like Ermal would be too complicated, that Italy wasn’t exactly gay-friendly, that Ermal’s fans could be quite…aggressive sometimes, and there were his children. Libero and Anita were everything for him, he loved them so much and felt bad whenever he dated someone because he felt like suddenly he didn’t have time for them, and maybe they wouldn’t accept his significant other. It already happened once, he presented a boyfriend to them and they didn’t like him at all. They liked Ermal, but they liked the singer, having him date their father was something else. Maybe he should call Giada, she was always giving great advices. Just when he thought that his phone rang, it was Giada.

 

“Giada, thank god. I need your help.”

 

“What? No, _I_ need your help.”

 

“Okay tell me.”

 

“it’s about Agata, you know the polish girl I love?”

 

“It’s always about her.”

 

“Okay first of all, not true. And second of all have you seen yourself with Ermal? Anyway. She came to my private view yesterday and she was so pretty, and she was listening to my explanations, she even asked questions. She seemed to like the paintings and especially the one I painted when I thought about her. I didn’t tell her that of course. Fabri I’m so gay for her, what should I do?”

 

“Are you really asking me for romantic advices? Giada, where have you been when we were dating and had two children? I literally just fucked everything up with Ermal last night.”

 

“Wait what? You were with Ermal last night? Tell me everything!”

 

“Well he came to the shop and asked for a bouquet to ask someone out and confess. So, I was mad. But then when I closed the shop he was there, in the café waiting for me. He gave me the bouquet I sold him and asked me out.”

 

“Oh my god.”

 

“I know, I had the same reaction. So, I said yes, and we went to a restaurant, it was very romantic. We talked a lot it was awesome. He talked about food, music, Rome. We were having a good time.”

 

“Oh no. I feel it coming.”

 

“I told him we couldn’t be together.”

 

“The fuck? Why?”

 

“It’s not reasonable Giada. He’s a star, he must go on tours, there are the gossipari. I don’t know if I can handle that.”

 

“But you like him?”

 

“Yes, of course.”

 

“And he likes you.”

 

“I think so.”

 

“It wasn’t question. Anyway, I’m sure you could make it work. It won’t be easy, but you can do that.”

 

“But what about the children?”

 

“Anita and Libero are okay with me being in love with Agata, they will be okay with you being n love with Ermal. And they like him, Anita never stops talking about the concert and the meeting and Libero is excited about the Albanian words Ermal taught him. They will be fine. You will be fine.”

 

Fabrizio smiled and sighed. He wasn’t sure. He was going to think about it. Why not? If Giada said they would be fine then it must be true, she was often right.

 

“Thank you, Giada, I’ll think about it. Now let’s talk about you and Agata.”

 

“Oh dear.”

 

“Confess to her.”

 

“Nope.”

 

“Why? You have nothing to lose! If she says no, then it will easier to move on. And if she says yes, and I think she will, you two will be together and you’ll be happy. You deserve to be happy Giada.”

 

“I don’t know if I can do it. I mean…have you seen her? She is so great.”

 

“I know, but you’re great too.”

 

He could feel Giada smile. Then she had to hang up because apparently Anita and Libero were fighting. Now Fabrizio was alone in his living room. The shop was closed today so he couldn’t go there and honestly, he didn’t really want to. He didn’t feel like talking to people right now. Except Ermal. But it was stupid, what could he tell him? “Hey, I know I was the worst asshole yesterday but please forgive and go out with me?” He would be even more of a jerk. And Ermal won’t forgive him anyway. Fabrizio totally understands him and couldn’t blame him. But still. There was a constant fight in his mind right now. He wanted to go to Ermal and apologize, but also, he was still hesitating. His brain was still telling him that it was a terrible idea. But Giada said they would be fine, that it would be hard, but they would be fine.  And he trusted Giada so much. He loved her, not in a romantic way but more in a platonic way. That was why they broke up, it wouldn’t work if Fabrizio wasn’t in love. But they were still close, for the children but mostly because they were best friends. Fabrizio really wished she would tell Agata how she felt. He couldn’t  be sure how Agata felt but he was sure she felt the same. They would make such a great couple.

 

He needed to relax so he turned the tv on. He switched aimlessly all the channels. Sport, news, dumb show, dumb show, news, Ermal, soap opera, sport. Wait what? He went back to the music channel. Ermal was here, as stunning as always. He looked a bit tired and Fabrizio felt bad. He watched the interview, Ermal was telling the journalist about his new album. Fabrizio knew everything about it, Ermal talked about it yesterday. He was so passionate about it. But this time it lacked something, a little spark. Suddenly Ermal sang a song.

 

“It’s a new song, I wrote it this morning, so you will be the first one to listen to it.”

 

Fabrizio couldn’t understand why but he had a weird sensation his stomach. A bad one. Ermal took his guitar and began to sing and Fabrizio quickly felt even worse.

 

“ _You are my flower,_

_I love you so, I want to protect you from this world._

_But you don’t want to._

_You refused everything I gave you._

_I gave you my heart, I gave you my everything._

_But you don’t want to,_

_You don’t care about it._

_To you the world is more important than me,_

_But why can’t you understand?_

_That I don’t care about the world._

_I just care about you._

_But you don’t want to_

_You made me hope,_

_You made my heart swing,_

_You destroyed it,_

_You destroyed everything_

_Why don’t you care about it?_

_Why don’t you want it?_

_Why don’t you want me?_

_Why don’t you care about me?_

_When you’re the only thing I want and care about.”_

 

Ermal’s voice was shaking and he was nearly crying. Fabrizio, in front of his tv, was drawing his face with his tears. Did Ermal really feel this way? Did he really fuck up that bad? Why was he even surprised honestly? He tried to stop crying. He had to see Ermal. He had to tell him that he wanted to. That he wanted Ermal. That he didn’t care about the world, that he cared more about him than anything else. Okay maybe not more than his family but you get the idea. But he didn’t have his address or his phone number. He hated himself for not having it. He needed to talk to him, one way or another. But how? Fabrizio cried even more. Oh god what have he done? And just because he was a scared coward. He was truly disgusted with himself.  He had been so scared of what the world would think that he forgot that Ermal alone should have been his world, but alas, you only realise the negligence too late when the flower has already died.

 


	11. Chapter 11

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Kudos to Ceci because she helped me

Fabrizio was staring to the wall absentmindedly. He didn't know what to do. He listened to Ermal’s song one more time, it was already all over the internet. Who broke Ermal’s heart like that? He took his phone out and called iada, he needed her. She answered quickly.

 

“Giada, have you listen to the song Ermal wrote?”

 

“Yes. You fucked up. You fucked so bad Fabrizio. I’d hate you right now if I didn’t know how you felt.”

 

“Thanks, that’s fixing everything.”

 

“Oh, don’t you dare telling me this.  _ You _ are the one who broke Ermal’s heart so I’m not the one who’s going to fix it.”

 

“I’m sorry, I shouldn’t have said that. What do I do?”

 

“Oh my god, are you that stupid? Go talk to him.”

 

“I can’t, he didn’t come to the shop today.”

 

“Wow what a surprise.”

 

“And I don’t know where he lives or his phone number.”

 

“There are no problems, only solutions. You follow Andrea and Marco on Instagram, right? Send them a message, ask them to help you.”

 

“Because they’re going to help me after I broke their best friend’s heart?”

 

“You are planning to talk to him to fix the mess you made. It might work.”

 

“I don’t know Giada…”

 

There was a pause. Fabrizio waited for Giada to say something, but apparently, she was thinking about something. She sighed.

 

“Look Fabrizio. If you send the messages I will ask Agata out.”

 

“Don’t ask her out just to make me send a message!”

 

“I’m not doing this for you, not completely. I really want to try. You and I both need to take our balls and do something for our love life.”

 

“You don’t have balls to take.”

 

“Fabri.”

 

Fabrizio thought about it, for approximately 3 seconds, before agreeing to do it. He needed to see Ermal so bad. Well if he was willing to listen to him. He hoped he will. Giada hung up, she had to look good to ask Agata out. Fabrizio wished her the best of luck. He looked at his phone and opened Instagram. He went on Andrea’s profile. He didn’t know why but it didn’t feel like a good idea to ask Marco. He wrote a message and sent it before he could regret it.

 

**Hello Andrea, can you give me Ermal’s address? I really need to talk to him. I need to fix things up.**

 

The answer arrived five minutes later, plenty of time for Fabrizio to die eight times. He opened the message with a shaky hand.

 

**8, vilae s. Gimignano. Digi code A1234, flat number 7.**

**I swear that if you don’t fix this I’m going to destroy you.**

 

Fabrizio smiled. He knew he would. He liked Andrea and Marco’s relationship with Ermal, they were so close, it was cute. He took a screenshot of the conversation and sent it to Giada.

 

**Now it’s your turn, go get that pussy.**

 

**Damn right I will!**

**No, I won’t, Fabri I’m terrified, can I not do this?**

 

**Do it Giada! It will be fine, I’m sure. Okay I’m going to Ermal.**

 

**Don’t. Fuck. This. Up.**

 

Fabrizio went to change his clothes. He worked in the shop all day, hoping to see Ermal entering and smiling to him but he knew it was stupid. He wasn’t surprised when the singer didn’t show up. His flat was located just upstairs his shop so as soon his work was over he ran upstairs and changed to sweatpants and an old, ugly shirt. He couldn’t go like that. He took a shower and tried his best to look good. In the end he chose a shirt that fit him well according to Giada and a pair of jeans. That will do. However, it was late, maybe he shouldn’t go, Ermal was probably sleeping. At 9pm. He wasn’t convincing anyone, including himself. He left his house and realised how far away Ermal’s place was so he took his car. Did Ermal really came that far away just to buy flowers at his shop? To see him? No, the street was very nice and peaceful. It was probably that. And to see him, Fabrizio wasn’t that dumb. He has been in love too and did things like that too. He remembered that he took dance classes 10 kilometres away from his house just because one of the girls was cute. It didn’t work at all because the girl already had a boyfriend but at least now Fabrizio was killing it when it came to dancing a waltz. He couldn’t think about that, he had to concentrate on Ermal. Only on him. That wasn’t very difficult. He took a deep breath and got out of his car. He entered the code and went up to the flat 7. He knocked at the door, praying for Ermal to be absent. Or sleeping. Or to open the door.

 

* * *

 

Ermal was eating ice cream while watching a soap opera. He felt like a huge cliché, but he couldn’t bring himself to care right now. He thought that writing a song would make him feel better and it did, a bit. He didn’t know if it was a good idea to sing it on TV but now it was too late to regret. At least he hoped Fabrizio saw it. No, he didn’t, it was a terrible mistake and Fabrizio was probably laughing at him for being so desperate and miserable. Oh god what was he thinking? No, it was a good thing, like this Fabrizio would see what he did and regret it. If he even watched the interview. But why would he? Ermal needed more ice cream. He received a text from Andrea.

 

**I’m sorry.**

**No, I’m not but please forgive me, it was important.**

 

Oh dear, Andrea used punctuation. This was bad. What did he do? Just when Ermal was writing the text the bell rang. What? It was late, who was going to visit him? He hit “send” and went to the door. He looked at himself in the mirror of the corridor. He looked like hell. Great. He opened the door. It was Fabrizio. He shut the door close. Immediately Fabrizio rang the bell again. What was he doing here? How did he even know where he lived? Oh no.  _ Andrea. _ Ermal was going to kill him.

 

**You’re a dead man.**

 

He heard Fabrizio knocking at the door. Couldn’t leave him alone? What was he doing here? Asking for an explanation about the song? Asking to delete it? Well sorry for him but Ermal won’t do that. Fabrizio knocked harder. This bastard was going to disturb the neighbours. Ermal opened the door.

 

“Stop, you’re disturbing people. And by ‘people’ I mean me.”

 

“Ermal I’m sorry I need to talk to you, it’s very important.”

 

“No.”

 

“Please, I swear after that I’ll leave you alone. I just…I need to explain things to you, please.”

 

Ermal looked at him. He seemed desperate. A part of his brain, a part that he hates was happy to see him like that. But he was sad. Sad to see the man he likes like this. He sighed. Hell, it would only make him more miserable, or it would be…helping to heard what Fabrizio had to say. He let him in and guided him to the living room. Fabrizio sat on the couch and Ermal on an armchair. He looked at him, waiting for Fabrizio to speak. Fabrizio was looking around and it made Ermal’s heart ache because a few days ago he would have been so happy to see him sitting on his couch.

 

“Right. Thank you for accepting to talk to me.”

 

“Hadn’t had much of a choice.”

 

It wasn’t nice, Ermal knew that but he felt bitter about the whole thing. Apparently, it was a stage of grief, anger. He already did shock and denial the night Fabrizio broke his heart, he felt pain the whole time and now he was just angry. It was going faster than what he thought. At least Fabrizio seemed guilty.

 

“Yes, I’m sorry about that. But it’s important and I couldn’t wait because I might chicken out and go back to be a coward again. Because that’s what I am, a coward. And it hurt you, I am so sorry for that. It’s just… I was having an amazing time during the dinner and I thought about…about what it would be…to date you, to go on dates with you again. And then it hit me. You’re a star. I tend to forget that because you’re so normal and not what I think stars are like. It’s a great thing, don’t worry. But anyway, I realised that you are a celebrity, that sometimes you will go on tours and leave me alone, that your fans could hate me for ‘”stealing” you, that it might cause you a lot of problems to be with a man in a rather homophobic country and that it might have an impact on your selling. And I didn’t want that. For me and for you. It scared me, and I told you that we couldn’t be together and to be honest I regretted it immediately. I really did. I wanted to take it back and tell you that I wanted the date to continue, to see where it could go. But my brain was too afraid of what was going to happen. So, I panicked and chose to run away. I am so sorry, and I would totally understand if you choose to not forgive me.”

 

Erma didn’t know what to say. Fabrizio feared dating him not because Ermal was famous, well not only, and could cheat on him or something but because he would be away, have problems with his Lupi and even…He even thought about his sales. It was weirdly sweet. Ermal felt a bit less mad about it. He could understand, he would probably scare him too if it was the other way around. But there was something he couldn’t understand.

 

“Why are you here?”

 

His face wasn’t harsh, but it wasn’t sweet either. It was just tired, like Ermal. Fabrizio flinched and seemed to hesitate.

 

“I… I was regretting it. Since yesterday but it was your song that convinced me. I wanted to see you so bad, to be with you from the moment I left the restaurant. I was disgusted by myself when I saw how you were and how you felt. I wanted to come to you in the studio and hug to make you feel better. I wanted to apologize, to tell you that I didn’t mean it, not fully. I am still scared, I don’t know what would happen if by any miracle you forgive me and…and maybe give another chance? I really like you Ermal, I acted like a dick because I was afraid, and I can’t forgive myself. You deserve better, I know that. I just wanted you to know how I felt and to give you an explanation. It’s the least I can do.”

 

Fabrizio was fidgeting, he kept looking at his hands and sometimes looking up to Ermal quickly before going back to his hands. Ermal was still processing what just happened. Fabrizio, the man he likes and who broke his heart, came to his house at 9pm to explain everything to him, apologize and ask for a second chance. Nothing made sense right now. Well to be more exact Fabrizio said that he would like another chance but knew he didn’t deserve one. He really didn’t know what to say. He wanted to give him a second chance, so badly. But Fabrizio was scared, scared of the reactions of people, scared of Ermal’s fame. What if it was suddenly too much for him? What if he decided to leave one day because “it’s too much”? Ermal didn’t know if he could bear to lose Fabrizio a second time because he was afraid.

 

“Fabrizio, I…I don’t what to say. I want to give you that second chance, to believe that it could work.”

 

Fabrizio’s face lighted up for a second before going back to his sadness.

 

“But you’re afraid that I will run away, again right?”

 

“Yes.”

 

“I understand. Look, I can’t promise you that I won’t run away, that I won’t be scared. Because I’m already scared. But I want to make it work, more than anything. I don’t care for the world.”

 

Ermal blushed and smiled at the reference. At least Fabrizio was honest with him and wasn’t promising that he will stay no matter what. He really appreciated it.

 

“Thank you for being honest. I’m going to be honest with you too. I don’t know. I don’t know what to think, what to do. It’s a bit too much right now. Can you give me a little time to think about it? Not too long, don’t worry, I’ll give you my answer in a few days.”

 

“Of course, take all the time you need Ermal.”

 

He smiled to him and got up. Fabrizio imitated him. He went to him and hugged him. Fabri’s arms were so strong, just like he imagined them. He was also very perfumed, it was crazy but Ermal loved it. He ended the hug reluctantly. He didn’t want to leave the embrace, it was too nice and warm. But Fabrizio had to leave. He thanked him and left the apartment.

 

* * *

 

Fabrizio went to his car and sat there, not moving for a moment. It went…well? He didn’t know. At least Ermal seemed ready to forgive him. Maybe not date him but at least having his forgiveness was enough for him. Of course, he wished there would be more, but he couldn’t force it on Ermal. Ermal needed time and Fabrizio was more than ready to give it to him. He was also ready to be rejected. It would hurt like hell of course but at least he would be able to move on. His heart ached at the thought. His took out his phone in a mechanic gesture. There was a ton of messages from Giada. Oh right, she was going to ask Agata out! He quickly opened the messages.

 

**Fabri which outfit is better?**

**[file.exe]**

**[file.exe]**

**[file.exe]**

**Wait why do I even ask you? You dress like a tramp everyday**

**Why aren’t you answering? Are you at Ermal’s?**

**How is it going?**

**Tell me later I’m going to see Agata, she’s working at the library. She is smart!**

**Fabri, I’m panicking. What if she says no?**

**Oh no she’s here.**

**Why does she have to be so pretty omg?**

**Okay I’m doing it.**

**FABRI**

**SHE SAID YES**

**OMG**

**SHE IS THE CUTEST**

**I AM STILL SHOCKED**

**She was blushing and said yes!!!!!**

**I have a date with Agata!!!**

**How am I supposed to sleep now??**

**Okay okay, you must be busy talking with Ermal. I understand. Please call me tomorrow morning**

**SHE SAID YES!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!**

 

Fabrizio laughed and smiled softly at the messages. He was so glad for Giada, at least her evening went well apparently. He couldn’t wait to call her and have all the details. But right now, he was exhausted and really needed to sleep.He knew that the events with Ermal wouldn’t leave his mind any time soon, he knew those memories will replay in his head and only the prospect of forgiveness and even hope for more could keep him company in this sleepless, lonely night.  

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for reading it !


	12. Chapter 12

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Still kudos to Ceci, who always helps me, you're the best !

The next morning Ermal asked Marco and Andrea to come to his place to talk. He needed help. Badly. He couldn’t decide what to do about Fabrizio. He wanted to give him a second chance but was too afraid. Would it really be reasonable? He was a star and Fabrizio had two children. He was afraid of Fabrizio too, what if he couldn’t bare Ermal’s fame? That’s why he needed his friends to help him. They arrived quickly, and the first thing Marco said to him was “you look like hell” which wasn’t surprising considering that Ermal didn’t sleep at all after Fabrizio left. They went to the living room and Marco and Andrea waited for him  to start talking. Ermal took his head in his hands and breathed loudly before getting up and explaining the problem to them.

 

“Last night, thanks to Andrea who I’m going to kill, Fabrizio came here. He wanted to talk to me about the way he reacted during our date. Apparently, he likes me too, but he’s afraid of all the consequences, the fans, the media, my albums selling too. He apologized for leaving like that and said that he regretted it deeply, that he doesn’t want to hurt me.”

 

Marco was the first one to  speak .

 

“Okay so he apologized, that’s great. At least he understands that he made a mistake. Do you want to forgive him?”

 

“I already did. He told me that he regretted it, and he explained why he left like that. That’s enough for me. Now do I let something happen?”

 

This time it was Andrea who answered.

 

“Look Ermal, if I gave him your address it’s for a reason. And I know what you’re going to say, no,  not to annoy you. You know me Ermal, I love to tease you but not like that. If I gave him your address, it’s because he seemed like a good guy, when I met him and when you talked about him. He told me he wanted to apologize and explain himself and honestly it could only do good for you. I think you should give him another chance. But talk with him.”

 

“Yes, talk a lot. Tell him that you’re afraid he’s going to leave, even if I think he knows that. You two can make it work, I think. But be honest with him.”

 

They continued to  give him some more advices , like to make his point very clear and  understandable . Ermal made his decision. He would give Fabrizio another chance. He never felt that good around someone who isn’t his Gran-gran before and he doesn’t want it to end. There was something hypnotic about this man. He was person full of contrasts. On the one hand he looked like a rocker with his ripped jeans, band t-shirts, earrings, deep voice and tons of tattoos, but on the other hand he worked in a flower shop, could tell you the meaning of nearly every plant, had the softest smile when he talked about his flowers and was so soft and gentle when he made bouquets.

 

Okay that was a big part of it but also because Fabrizio had such a presence, you couldn’t miss him. This man wasn’t only the most handsome guy Ermal has ever seen in his life, he was also the sweetest, nicest man and who wouldn’t hurt a fly. Okay he did hurt Ermal, but he regretted it and apologized and quite frankly Ermal could understand that he panicked.

 

He thought about how to proceed for a long time. Should he go to the flower shop and kiss him deeply in front of the old ladies? Go to his house even if he didn’t know where he lived? He hated himself for not having his address or phone number. It would have been so useful. His only option was to go to the flower shop, during lunch time, so they would be alone. Yes, and he could bring him lunch, it would be nice. Or tonight? Once the shop is closed? No, it would look too much like their first date. Yes, but in the evening they would have more time to talk and maybe even kiss if everything goes well. No, Ermal shouldn’t think about that. The most important step for them was to talk and make things clear then they would maybe kiss and cuddle. God Ermal hoped they would.

 

The next morning Ermal woke up, he managed to sleep a little this time, and considered the option of cooking lunch himself. He asked Marco for advice, so he took out his phone.

 

**Marco should I cook lunch for me and Fabrizio? I’m going to talk to him at noon**

 

**Fam. You want to bang him not kill him**

 

**You could have said it nicely**

 

**Disagree, this was me being nice**

 

Sometimes Ermal was asking himself if he really chose his friends well. But Marco did have a point, if Ermal wanted this conversation to go well then, he probably shouldn’t cook. He was a terrible cook and therefore avoided cooking as much as possible. God bless pre-cooked meals. Instead he prepared himself and went to a Mexican restaurant to grab some take away. He only knew that Fabrizio liked spicy food, he even suffered from it, so he chose something that looked spicy and delicious and a burger for himself. He then went to the shop, it was nearly noon, so Fabrizio would close the shop soon. On the way Ermal began to doubt. What if Fabrizio changed his mind? What if now wasn’t a good time? Maybe he should go back another day? No, it was going to be today. Ermal couldn’t wait.

 

He arrived at the shop and he didn’t expect to be that nervous. Even the peaceful street that usually relaxed him couldn’t calm his nerves. But this conversation was going to be important. He  arrived just a few minutes before it closed for lunch break. He entered however couldn’t see Fabrizio anywhere. There wasn’t even a client. Fabrizio shouldn’t  leave  his shop  unoccupied like that. Just when he thought that, Fabrizio came in, holding a lot of pots. It was hot, and the sleeves of his t-shirt were rolled up, letting Ermal take a good look at his biceps. Dear god. He couldn’t think of this now. It wasn’t the right moment at all. Fabrizio couldn’t see him because of the huge pile of pots he was holding.

 

“Hello, sorry but the shop is going to close soon. You should come back later.”

 

Ermal smiled. He cleared his throat.

 

“Actually, I was hoping it would close soon, so we could eat together.”

Fabrizio put his pots down quickly, obviously very surprised to see him. he smiled to Ermal nervously. 

 

“Ermal! Hey how are you?”

 

“”I’m fine thanks. Do you want to have lunch with me today?”

 

Ermal showed him the two bags of food he carried with him with a smile. He hoped it wasn’t obvious but he was sweating like hell. He was so nervous. But apparently Fabrizio was just as nervous. He accepted and closed the shop. 

 

“I usually eat in my flat, do you want to go there?”

 

“It’s far away?”

 

“Just upstairs.”

 

Ermal agreed in a heartbeat, he was curious to see where Fabrizio lived. He followed him upstairs and wasn’t exactly surprised by the decoration, it was like Fabrizio. There were band posters, a lot of flowers, a guitar, drawings obviously made by a child and a lot of photos too. Wait a guitar? Okay now that was interesting, he had to ask Fabrizio to play one day. They sat in the living room and smiled awkwardly to each other. Ermal didn’t know how to bring the topic in the conversation. A conversation that didn’t exist for the moment. 

 

“Isn’t it dangerous to leave the shop unoccupied like that?”

 

Not the best conversation starter but at least now they were going to talk.

 

“No it’s okay, I have an alarm during the day.”

 

“An alarm?”

 

Fabrizio got up and gestured for Ermal to join him at the window. He pointed at the café in front of the shop.

 

“You see that old man? His name is Roberto and he is watching the shop, when he sees something isn’t like usually he screams and I run to see what’s wrong.”

 

“There are so many things wrong with that alarm.”

 

“Hey Roberto is a lovely old man!”

 

“I didn’t mean it like that and you know it.”

 

Ermal playfully punched Fabrizio’s arm, laughing. It was nice to laugh with him again. The sat down and began to eat. Fabrizio liked what Ermal picked up, it wasn’t something he usually ate but he really liked it. They were having their lunch in silence for a moment until they were finished and Fabrizio turned to Ermal. 

 

“So...I guess you’re not here just for the pleasure of eating Mexican food with me.”

 

“It could be but no. You see I thought about what you say and...us.”

 

Fabrizio was fidgeting and looking down at his hands. Ermal took a deep breath and got closer to him. 

 

“I...I want to  try and give you another chance.” 

 

Fabrizio’s face lighted up. Ermal smiled softly to him. he was so adorable, how was it possible? 

 

“But first we have to talk.”

 

“Of course, I totally understand. You go first.”

 

“I was really hurt about the way you acted at the end of our date, but you already know that. I understand why you acted the way you did, I would have probably done the same thing. I just...I need to be sure that you’re not going to run away again just because of my career. And that you’re not going to make me choose between you and my job because I wouldn’t be able to make that choice.”

 

“I know that and I would never ask you to do it. I thought about it, about what would happen if you decided to give me a second chance. What if we keep things slow first? Just between us and our friends. To see how we manage to deal with that and after a few months or when we feel ready you tell your fans and  the media about our relationship?”

 

“I thought about the same thing. Yes taking our time sounds good.”

 

They continued to  discuss about many things, what was going to happen, how to break the news to the children. They took their time to talk, making sure everything was clear and accepted by both parties. They continued to get closer to each other and in the end they were cuddling while talking. It was very nice but sadly Fabrizio had a shop to run and Ermal a meeting at his studio. They parted away unwillingly, but they didn’t have a choice, they were going to be late. Ermal was going to leave when Fabrizio reminded him that they still hadn’t exchange phone numbers.After receiving Fabrizio's number Ermal saved him under “Bizio <3”. 

 

Ermal had to rush to his meeting but in the end he managed to be on time. It was a rather boring meeting about what direction his new album should take, what he should write about...Ermal didn’t like it when people forbid him to write about something. If he was inspired he wrote about what inspired him. It was that simple. Needless to say, he wouldn’t listen to his managers. Behind him he could feel Marco and Andrea’s eyes staring at him so much that they were probably going to make a hole in his shirt. Once the meeting was over they rushed to him. 

 

“So?”

 

“What happened? are you guys together?”

 

“Yes, we are.”

 

Ermal couldn’t help but smile like an idiot when he said that. Marco and Andrea congratulated him and asked to know more. 

 

“Did you guys kiss?”

 

Seriously Andrea, what were you? 12? They...oh my god. It hit Ermal.They didn’t kiss. He had been dying to kiss Fabrizio for months and now that he could he didn’t do it. How stupid was he? Marco laughed at him for that. Ermal truly felt dumb. What if Fabrizio thought he didn’t want to kiss him? Oh no. Just at this moment he received a text from Fabrizio. Andrea read by his shoulder. 

 

“Oooooh Bizio, with a heart. Ah young and dumb love, how sweet is that?”

 

“Shut up.”

 

He opened the text, ignoring Andrea and Marco’s sheanigans. 

 

**Hey Ermal, sorry to disturb you but do you want to go on a date with me tonight? Nothing too fancy, just eating pizza in front of a movie at my place. Or something fancier if you want.**

 

**You’re not disturbing me at all. I would love watching movies with you, it sounds great. Should I bring something?**

 

**If you can pick up wine it would be perfect.**

 

**Oh so it is going to be fancy after all.**

 

**Shut up**

**Come around 8pm if that’s okay for you.**

 

**Perfect!**

**I can’t wait**

 

**I can’t wait either <3**

  
  


He turned to his friends with a huge smile on.

 

“I have a date!”

 

“Yes and you also have a song to write Romeo so get to work.”

 

Ermal began to work on a new song, one about love. What a surprise. His friends kept making fun of him but he ignored them. He was not thinking about Fabrizio when he talked about “tracing drawing on your body” okay? And neither was he talking about his new boyfriend in the sentence “you make my heart go as wild as you hair” and...dear god he wasn’t fooling anyone. He was totally writing another love song for Fabrizio. He thought of the first one he wrote. It must still be in pieces in his bin, at home. He would take care of that later. 

 

At 8pm sharp he was in front of Fabrizio’s door with a bottle of wine in his hand. He showered, changed and wasn’t fidgeting at all. Fabrizio came quickly and Ermal felt like dying. Why was he so hot? He changed his band shirt for a white shirt opened to the third button. Ermal was doing his best to not stare but it was difficult when he just discovered that Fabrizio had tattoos on his chest, including a cross pretty low if you asked him. However Fabrizio seemed oblivious to his ogling and invited him in with a smile. They were both so nervous, it wasn’t normal.Usually things were easy-going around Fabrizio, that was why Ermal liked him so much. The apartment has been cleaned up and Netlfix was on with pizza on the coffee table. Ermal needed to do something to ease the tension. So he did the first thing he could think of; he kissed Fabrizio. He didn’t work well under pressure. But apparently Fabrizio didn’t mind and kissed him back. At least it did the trick because now they were less tense. 

 

“Sorry, I was so in a rush at lunch that I didn’t even took the time to kiss you.”

 

Fabrizio smiled to him and kissed him again. His beard was scratchy and Ermal loved it. Fabrizio told him that it was okay, he was in a rush too and didn’t think of kissing either.

 

“What a romantic couple we are!”

 

They went to the couch and chose a movie to watch. They settled down with Pride, “because there isn’t such a thing as a too gay evening Bizio.” Ermal realized immediately that he called Fabrizio “Bizio”. But his boyfriend didn’t seem to mind at all and kissed his cheek. They began to eat and watch the movie. It was in english with italian subtitles and some jokes didn’t translate well so Ermal had to pause the movie to explain them to Fabrizio. In the middle of the movie they became more interested in kissing than in watching the movie. That was when Fabrizio’s phone rang. He swore loudly and got up to answer his phone. Ermal drank his glass of wine while waiting for Fabrizio to come back on the couch.

 

“Giada, what’s wrong?”

 

_ “...” _

 

“Oh that’s right, your date was tonight. Why are you calling me then?”

_ “...” _

 

“Are you really calling me just to tell me that Agata is beautiful and wonderful? I’ll let you know that I’m on a date too, so if you could not disturb me.”

 

_ “...” _

 

“Of course with Ermal, with who else?”

 

Ermal smiled at that and wondered who was this Giada.

 

_ “...” _

 

Fabrizio turned to Ermal and smiled softly to him. 

 

“Yes it’s going pretty well. Wait, where are you right now?”

 

_ “...” _

 

“You’ve been in the toilets for the past 10 minutes? What the fuck Giada? Agata must be so worried. Go back in there.”

 

_ “...” _

 

“If I think that she is getting the wrong idea? Giada. You’ve been hiding from her for 10 minutes she must be thinking that you didn’t want to be here and ran away or something.”

 

_ “...” _

 

“I’ll tell you what you’re going to do, you’re going back to your table, apologize to her and kiss her. In that order. Now go.”

 

_ “...” _

 

“Yes I am sure. Holy shit Giada stop torturing this poor girl. I know that you have this habit to hide in the bathroom when a date goes too well, but it’s scary. It used to make me so nervous. Beside I have my boyfriend waiting for me on the couch so get your ass out of this bathroom.”

 

He hung up and went back to the couch with a smile. He apologized to Ermal for making him wait. Ermal was lost who was this Giada? She used to go on dates with fabrizio? She was one of his exes? He was still talking with one of his exes? He didn’t understand what was happening. So he asked Fabrizio who was calling.

 

“It was Giada, Anita and Libero’s mother. She is on a date and wanted to tell me that it’s going very well and that she is very happy.”

Okay that was weird. Ermal must have made a face because Fabrizio laughed. 

 

“Yeah, it’s a bit weird but it’s Giada, she was so nervous to go on this date she needed to hear herself tell someone that it’s going well.”

 

“Oh so you two are still in a good relationship?”

 

“Yeah we’re best friends. It was important for us to stay close for the kids but it’s over between us. Beside now she is very much in love with a girl named Agata. She is lovely and tonight was their first date.”

 

“Oh then I’m glad it’s going well! Do you have photos of her?”

 

“What about the movie?”

 

“Fuck the movie, I’m rooting for Giada and...Agata?”

 

“Yep that’s her name. She’s polish. Wait I need to tell you the whole story.”

 

In the end they spent the whole evening gossiping on their friends, Ermal now knew all the story of how Giada discovered that she wasn’t as straight as planned when she saw Agata and how she is dying every time she sees her. They seemed like funny people. Ermal didn’t want to leave Fabrizio’s arms, he was feeling so good right now, Fabrizio’s strong arms around him while eating pizza. If only he would have been in pyjamas it would have been the perfect date. But sadly they both had work to do the next morning so Ermal had to go home. Neither of them wanted to let go and they continued to kiss while repeating that “I should leave, I have a meeting tomorrow” and “I have so much work tomorrow, we need to stop”. They had no will power at all. But after 20 minutes they finally managed to let go of each other. Ermal kissed him one last time and thanked him for the evening. He went home with a huge dumb smile on his face. He had a boyfriend!

 


	13. Chapter 13

This morning when Ermal woke up he was very happy. Yesterday he had a wonderful date with Fabrizio, his boyfriend. Because he had a boyfriend. He could finally say it. They still had many things to figure out and a lot to talk about but for the moment Ermal just wanted to enjoy his time with Fabrizio. He had rehearsal all morning but the afternoon he was free, so he should go to Fabrizio’s shop. To buy something for his mother of course. He liked his mother a lot. And to kiss his boyfriend too. Because he could and would, kiss Fabrizio whenever he wanted.

 

He went to the studio his head still full of Fabrizio’s images. Fabrizio smiling, Fabrizio hugging him, Fabrizio kissing him, Fabrizio looking way too hot in his white shirt, Fabrizio…Okay he should probably stop here before he would have to deal with a “problem” in the studio. Andrea and Marco would never leave him alone if he had a boner around them. He could already hear the “oh, Ermal we’re flattered but are you already cheating on Fabrizio?” and “well, well, seems like someone is distracted, you naughty boy.” He shivered in horror. He spent the morning rehearsing and messing up with the gender of his love songs, earning a lot of teasing from his friends.

 

Finally, it was time for him to go to the flower shop after a quick lunch break. He couldn’t wait to see Fabrizio again, he hoped the feeling was mutual. Sadly, at the last moment his manager stopped him making Ermal groaned internally. He was just asking for what direction they should go for the album cover. Like if he knew that or even cared, let Rinald work his magic as always and let him go to his boyfriend. His brother knew him very well and knew what he liked and didn’t like, he had his full trust for his album design. He just had to send him the songs, he would do it tonight. He made this conversation as short as possible, so he just said “ask Rinald, bye” and ran to his car before his manager could say something.

 

He arrived at the shop quickly and took the time to look around him in the street. How could a street so close to the main street be so calm? With this beautiful weather it was a perfect day. He looked by the window of shop and nearly died. The shop was empty except for Fabrizio and Anita. The little girl must be helping today too. She was adorable, and her father’s smile was the sweetest smile Ermal ever saw. But what was even more adorable was that Fabrizio was currently teaching Anita how to do flower crowns. Apparently, it wasn’t the first one they were doing because they were both already wearing flower crowns. Fabrizio’s was a bit messy, so it must be Anita’s work. It was full of roses, lilies, dahlias and lilies of the valley. The flowers didn’t really go well together but it was somehow cute. It was even more cute to see a heavily tattooed man, wearing a Metallica shirt and, from what Ermal could see, ripped jeans proudly wearing a flower crown his daughter made. It was very pink and was breaking the complete black outfit. Ermal realised that he has been standing in front of the shop, looking at the florist and his daughter for the past 10 minutes so he decided to enter. Anita and Fabrizio immediately looked up and both smiled when they recognized him.

 

“Ermal!”

 

The little girl seemed very enthusiast to see a man she only saw twice before, it surprised Ermal. But because she was here Ermal didn’t dare to kiss Fabrizio, he probably didn’t tell his children yet.

 

“Hi Anita, hi Fabrizio, how are you?”

 

“Good, papa is teaching me how to make flower crowns!”

 

“Yes, I can see that.”

 

Anita looked down on her nearly finished crown. She quickly added a few flowers and decide that it was good enough. She gestured to Ermal, so he would lean forward. She put the flower crown on his head and nodded, satisfied of her work.

 

“You look so pretty now! Papa doesn’t he look very pretty?”

 

Fabrizio who has been watching the scene with a soft smile nodded.

 

“He does, great job Ani.”

 

Ermal was melting. She gave him a flower crown, she was beaming in joy, she was so adorable. And her smile was the same as Fabrizio, just like her eyes. He thanked her and told her that he loved it, making the little girl squealed in joy. Fabrizio laughed and turned to Ermal.

 

“Okay, you’re very pretty but do you need anything? Or do you think the crown is enough?”

 

Ermal wanted to answer that he needed a kiss, but it was too cheesy, and Anita was still here.

 

“I need a bouquet for my mother.”

 

“Sure thing.”

 

Fabrizio quickly made a beautiful bouquet as always while Anita was telling Ermal about what Maria said yesterday during recess. She said that Gabriele was her lover which is stupid because Gabriele was going to marry Anita and Maria was just a liar, she already lied when she said that she didn’t stole Louisa’s scissors while Anita saw her with her own eyes. Could he believe it? Ermal couldn’t believe it and has no idea who was the people Anita was telling him about. So, he just nodded along and hummed from times to times. He saw Fabrizio holding back a laugh while he was finishing the bouquet.

 

“And here you go Ermal.”

 

“Do you need a ribbon?”

 

 Anita asked the question, but she was already near the ribbons, scissors ready to cut a glittery purple one with a look that meant “don’t you dare say no”. Ermal held back a laugh, this little girl was only 5 and was already so bossy.

 

“Of course, I need a ribbon, what a question.”

 

Anita nodded with a very serious face, showing Ermal he made a good decision. Now both Fabrizio and Ermal were trying to hold back a laugh. Anita cut the ribbon and tied it around the bouquet with a very concentrated face, sticking her tongue out. She then presented the result to Ermal with a huge smile and a “tadaaa”. The ribbon didn’t match the bouquet.

 

“It’s perfect thank you.”

 

“Okay Anita, you did a great job but now I believe you have homework to do.”

 

“But papa…”

 

“We had a deal Anita, as soon as you served a client you had to go to your homework.”

 

Anita grumbled and waved goodbye to Ermal who waved back and watched her leaving in the back of the store to a door. As soon as she closed the door Fabrizio leant forward to kiss Ermal.

 

“Sorry, I wanted to do that since you entered the shop.”

 

“There’s nothing to be sorry about. I didn’t dare kiss you in front of Anita, I assumed you didn’t tell them yet.”

 

“No, it’s a bit early for that, it’s only been two days after all, I’m sure they wouldn’t mind but I want to be sure it’s working well between us.”

 

“Of course, I understand.”

 

Ermal looked at the flower crown Fabrizio was still wearing and kissed him softly.

 

“It suits you so well.”

 

Fabrizio seemed to remember that he was wearing it.

 

“I know right? Beside I can’t take it off, Anita would never forgive me.”

 

“She’s very bossy, isn’t she?”

 

“Oh yes, she took after her mother.”

 

Ermal suddenly remembered that Anita and Libero’s mom was on a date yesterday, he knew the whole story now. He asked Fabrizio if he had any news of Giada and Agata.

 

“Oh yes, Giada eventually went out of the bathroom and kissed her. She sent me tons of photos of them and Agata with messages like “look at my girlfriend”, “that’s right I have a girlfriend now”, “can you believe I have a girlfriend??” and the now famous “Fucking hell she’s such a catch, how did I manage to convince her to date me?”

 

Ermal laughed at this story and decided to not tell that after their date he called all his friend screaming that he had a boyfriend, the hottest boyfriend and that they should all be jealous. Instead he kissed Fabrizio a few times more and hugged him. He was so good in his arms, he didn’t want to leave at all. But they had to part away when an old lady came in. Ermal discreetly caressed Fabrizio while thanking him for the bouquet. He then left the shop reluctantly. Why did people had to come in the shop seriously? Well, now he had to go to his mother’s. He hoped she baked Albanian cakes because he needed them to comfort himself from the fact he spent so little time with Fabrizio. He didn’t even take a picture of him with his flower crown. But thank god Fabrizio seemed to have read his mind because he sent him a selfie of him with his crown and winking. Dear god, he was trying to kill him. He smiled like an idiot when he arrived at his mom’s house.

 

“Oh, someone is in love.”

 

Ermal just hummed, he didn’t want to tell her now about Fabrizio, it was too early for the moment. His mother tried to know who the mysterious person was who made his son smile like that but seeing that she earned nothing she became grumpy and accused him to come only to eat because he was physically unable to cook eatable food. Ermal should probably have been offended by that but he knew it was true.  While he’s mother was telling him about what happened to her neighbour Ermal thought about Fabrizio, he missed him already. It was nearly scaring him, he never felt that way before, even in the very beginning when he still had the honeymoon feeling, but he didn’t mind it, it was nice.  
  


"Is it the florist who made me the bouqte and this beautiful crown?"

 

Just when he thought hsi mother would leave him alone. He blushed when he realized that he was still wearing the crown. He took it of quickly and shuttered something about having a lot of work to do and ran away from the house.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you so much for reading it !


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